Don't Worry, Be Happy

 

My daughter will be two in February and I think her terrible twos are starting early. She often gets stuck on one thing and has such a strong will and determination about it. The other day, Baby Ben was sitting in his little reclining chair, kicking away as 3 month olds do. Madi walked over to him and said, "Stop wiggling, Ben." He didn't stop. "Stop wiggling, Ben!" she shouted. He mistook her intentions, smiled at her and started kicking harder. "STOP WIGGLING, BEN!" She put her hand out so it was just above his foot (as if she was using the force) and began to have a little fit, screaming over and over for him to sit still. This took me by surprise because who cares if he's wiggling? We have bigger fish to fry, Madi. But she cared and she cared passionately. After an appropriate length of time (I realized this was going to involve an altercation if I didn't step in) I went over to them and said, "Madi, it's ok if Ben wiggles. Don't worry about it, be a happy girl."

 

My words hit home with me more than with her. She required much more conversation and redirection but rest assured, Ben is allowed to wiggle freely - for now.  We have been talking a lot recently about being a happy girl. When she whines and complains for no reason, she has to go to her room and can come out when she is a "happy girl." So I have been using this jargon a lot lately. I keep thinking about my words to her. "Don't worry about it, be a happy girl." Sometimes I feel like I run around trying to keep things in my life from "wiggling." When really, who cares? Just be a happy girl, Asheena.

Adorable kids on Thanksgiving

It's ok if things aren't just how I like them. I know I talk about my house a lot. I always want it to be cleaner than it is. It's this upward battle - me against the world who wants my house to be a disaster. It always does better when I don't worry about it, when I clean as I go or clean a little where I am. It all adds up and in the end it's livable and I can be a happy girl. When I am not a happy girl, things always get worse.

I will always pick kids and sanity!

Yesterday I got a break from both kids for a few hours and Mike and I cleaned. It felt so good to get things situated how I like them. It felt like a vacation. Then when Madi got home, she ran over to her toy box and threw a few things onto the ground. Maybe she was excited to be home and wanted to play. Maybe she didn't recognize the house without her toys all over the place. Or maybe she thinks they actually go on the ground and I made a mess by cleaning them up.  Or maybe she knew I wanted to keep the living room clean and it's her goal to throw me off my game - no, lets go with the first one. Either way, my illusion of a clean house was shattered. I internally sighed, then said to myself, "Don't worry about it, be a happy girl."

Amazing photo by
Ashley Jennings Photography